Heart Seasons

I was sitting in class the other day, thinking through the emotional ups and downs that we all go through. We, especially as teens with the hormonal help, all go through rollercoaster ride, but all experience it differently. Some give in to the lows, becoming depressed and finding little joy in life. Others fixate themselves with the highs and are happy all the time, feeling absolutely no emotion. Both are dangerous places to be. Others just buckle in and make the most of the $2 they paid for their ticket.

When we are so focused on what goes wrong in our lives, dwelling on the pain inflicted on us and the mistakes we make we cannot possibly find any joy because we are out looking for miserable situations. We do not expect to find happiness, so we do not recognise it when it comes our way, we see only the pain. We are not able to share our passing joy with others even if we do find it because we feel as if our joy is insignificant compared to what is going around us. We begin to ostracise ourselves, pull away from the constantly happy because they make us feel bad about ourselves but also avoiding the others who are constantly in pain because they only bring us down further.

The same is true for those of us that focus purely on the happiness. Often it is to run away from severe pain in the past, just to experience joy because one miserable moment can bring it all back, or it can be just a mask we wear in public. But when we only see the happiness, which is portrayed as the ideal person to be in our world, we miss the pain and suffering of others, miss the opportunity to comfort them and relate to them. When you are in pain, is it easier to talk to someone who seems to only have ever had together, always happy or someone who you know has gone through your pain but has come out the other side? Also, when we are constantly living that happy-high life, we may not realise when we hurt others because nothing bothers us anymore. We do not see the impact of our words because we do not realise anymore what hurts and what helps; neither are experiences we have anymore.

But when we strap in, hold tightly to the hand rail, scream when sprayed with water or dropped upside down, smile with our hands up in the air by the camera and go for a second ride when we're done; that's when we truly enjoy life. Going through the ups and making the most of them, plunging into the lows but learning from them and ensuring that we are supported by the people around us. We need to learn to go with life's emotions; experience them, learn from them and make the most of them.

Our emotions are not quite like a rollercoaster, where you can see every turn before you even get into the cart, but more like the weather. Well, Auckland's weather; unpredictable but following some sort of rough pattern; summer, autumn, winter, spring. But the only difference is that our seasons may not last for the standard 3 months, differing like Auckland with all four seasons in one day.

I have written a poem while in the pits of the emotional low, but it's too depressing to share here and so I thought I'd jot down a positive poem about the rollercoaster of our hearts. So, without future ado, here it is:


Heart Seasons

 Just like our home,
This planet on which,
We find ourselves,
Our hearts too,
Go through seasons.

Troublesome times bring,
Torrential teardrops,
Hurricane gasps,
Horrendous heartache,
Our heart winter.

After tears, must come,
The shining rainbow of,
Forgiveness and renewal,
A time for new dreams,
Our heart spring.

Intensity of feelings,
Joy, love and success,
Escalating emotions,
Time to just soak in,
Our heart summer.

Times of change bring forth,
Falling and colouring feeling,
Again tough times,
Disappointments and change,
Our heart autumn.